We're getting down to the wire. That, my friends, is just a little bit insane. We've anticipated this time of the year since April!
In fact, for the past months we've been trying to convince her to make her birthday yesterday, December 18th. It was the most ideal date for lots of reasons, like family in town, Clint having the most time home, etc. But alas, she thinks she's not done cookin.
(this was at 37 weeks)
I wanted to give a quick update with how pregnancy is going these days but first I want to say something. I feel like sometimes when I'm real about how hard pregnancy is and how hard my pregnancy has been, people thing I'm ungrateful. I am so incredibly grateful for this little girl. I never knew you could love something so much before even seeing. I really don't mean to be insensitive to anyone. I know a lot of people say they don't like to blog about the hard things because they don't want to remember them, but I disagree with that.
My college degree isn't such a big accomplishment to me because it was so easy and fun and I sailed through it. It's a big deal because of all those hard times. It's a big deal because of how I felt when I saw my first F on a test and instead of giving up, I worked my butt off and ended up getting a B. It's a big deal because I didn't think I could do it and now I'm graduating with honors. It's a big deal because of how much I've invested in the last 4 years, all the stress, and how HARD it has been. I want to remember those times because that is what contributes to a sense of accomplishment. So yes, believe it or not I do want to remember those nights (like last night) where I only slept for four hours. I want to remember that I threw up 14 times a day. I want to remember that for a whole 9 months I felt absolutely terrible. I want to remember all those hard things because of the purpose behind them. I've done all that for my sweet baby girl. While it's still really really hard, it's an honor to sacrifice for someone you love. What's a bigger accomplishment than becoming a mother? I want to remember how hard I've worked for her and also remember how worth it it has already been.
(outside of the building where my almost impossible biochemistry class took place)
(stop staring at my kankles, yo! I saw that...)
Ironically, after making that point I don't really feel like talking about my symptoms lately. Maybe we'll just let that sink in.
But I am making progress!
She dropped around 34 weeks (a little sooner than average) and it feels like she drops lower every day! Sometimes I feel like she is going to fall out.
My weight has stabilized. I lost three pounds in a week which can be a sign that labor is fairly soon. Despite the fact that I feel like a whale (and I look like one too), my weight gain is totally in the middle of what's recommended. I'm really looking forward to seeing how much of this is water weight!
I've been having lots of contractions. Last night they lasted for hours but were pretty mild. And obviously, they went away. Sad face. Still, it's a good sign.
Speaking of contractions, having them so consistently made it really real and It freaked me out a little bit. My whole pregnancy I've pretty much been in survival mode. Survive the sickness. Survive work. Survive school. Now that I'm not working or going to school, I'm able to think about things I was much to busy to before. Like tearing. And episiotomy. That's probably the thing that scares me the most with labor. It gave me a little bit of anxiety. I just need to stay calm and wait for this baby :)
This might be TMI for some people, but most people want to know. I'm dilated to a 1 and the cervix is soft. My body is making little preparations. My doctor said it's not uncommon for first time moms to not really dilate until actual labor so it's a poor sign of how soon it's coming.
My belly is measuring smaller than average (believe it or not), but she's measuring ahead of schedule. My doctor seemed a little surprised when she told me how big she is. Not gonna lie, it doesn't surprise me one bit. My family has giant monster babies. Who doesn't love a chubby baby right?
Thank you for all of your love and support :)
Huge thanks to Annie for my graduation pictures! She is so great :)