Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Lots of Thoughts

This mom stuff is hard. In some ways I feel like I'm already such a bad mom. Is this that mom guilt business they talk about? Afterall, I couldn't take prenatals my first trimester, I've eaten deli meat, haven't exercised more than walking to get the mail, took my migraine medication for awhile before I knew I was pregnant, have eaten terribly, still am in the negatives as far as weight gain, used heating pads, have to take zofran and other medications, have not been listening to clasical music to boost my childs IQ, etc, etc, etc. Shouldn't I at least have a baby in my arms before I get all the criticism for not doing what I'm supposed to or doing what I'm not supposed to?Afterall, the "experts" aka what some random person on babycenter or a stranger at the mall says has to be right, right?

In some ways, I feel like I'm going into this blindly. Like, what's a baby again? But then in other ways, I know I'm not. I knew my baby was a girl from the second I got pregnant. I knew when something was wrong and to go to the doctor. And I already know and love my sweet girl a crazy amount. That has to count for something right?

I don't think I'll ever be that put together mom whose kids have perfectly coordinating outfits and manages a schedule perfectly consisting of soccor, dance, piano, church, school, and manages to volunteer at school and is president of some charity organization. Just ain't my cup of tea.

I plan on letting my kids wear lime green flower print with red stripes....just maybe not on picture day. I plan on helping my kids cultivate their talents and learn the important stuff. I mean the kind of important stuff that lasts forever. I plan on showering my 14 year old babies with more kisses and hugs in a day than they'd care to have in a decade. I plan on lots of fingerpainting, dance recitals, halloween costumes, and unfortunately, stinky diapers. I plan on teaching my kids why life is so great...why THEY are so great.

Sometimes I feel bad that my kids will have to suffer through my imperfections, and other times, I think they might even be a little lucky. Either way, I'm so so so excited to be called "mom."


Jennifer said...

Do not ever listen to what random people on babycenter say! Everyone on there thinks they are holier than thou.. You will be a great mom!

Sean and Deana said...

I totally know how you feel! I felt like that all the time. But I'm sure if all of those "horrible things" people say we shouldnt do while pregnant were all that bad no one would survive the womb. haha. (well with the exception of drinking or doing crack, which I'm sure youre not doing so you rock!)Its good to follow your instincts and decide for yourself what you are ok with. You are a great mom already because you love that little girl more than anything and you do your best! Thats all you can do :)