Tuesday, April 12, 2011

It's the hardest part.

When I got engaged, I asked a bunch of friends what they thought the hardest part of marriage was. Everyone seemed to give one of two answers. It was either (1) their family getting too involved, family drama, spending time with two families, something about the family and (2) was money- budgeting with what's most important to two people- since we all have different priorities, having enough money, something about money. Since getting engaged and talking about those issues, those two will most definitely not be a walk in the park. They will still take a lot of work and effort. However, I have come up with my own.
I think time will the the hardest. Budgeting time. Balance. How much time is okay to spend on homework, cleaning, work, church responsibilities, with family, with friends, etc? How much time should we need to spend together? We are, ultimately, each other's number one priority, no exceptions, but it's not like we can be the only priority. Like I've said earlier, you may recall, I would love to live peacefully on a deserted island with Clint for the rest of our lives. However, we are grown ups with lame responsibilities like getting educations and working. The other day I went to go sign for our apartment. Clint had gone twice or so before to look at our model and all that. I couldn't make it the times he went. Then, an apartment opened up and we had to make a decision fast. I had to go down to the apartments by myself to make the choices-without even seeing our floorplan! Several apartments were open and I didn't know which to choose. It didn't help that I couldn't reach him on the phone. As silly as this sounds, it was so frustrating that Clint couldn't be there with me. It wasn't his fault at all. He had a test to take and I completey understand that. I know he saccrifices so much for me already and I love him for that. Still, I felt like it was something I would have loved to share with him. If we see each other on a week night, it's only for about an hour. Weekend dates are still limited to a few short hours, because I have work early Saturday and church early Sunday and Clint has a lot of homework. Plus, with being sick I need more sleep and am exhausted and feeling sick pretty much all the time. We rarely get to talk throughout the day. It's not the way I would like it, but I guess this is the way it has to be for now. I hear it's better when you live under the same roof. At least we'll be able to see each other a teensy bit more. At least then he can tell me about his silly dreams over a bowl of wheaties in the mornings! Not gonna lie, I'm pretty excited for that. It's definitely a good thing we want to spend more time together, no? :) We just can't get enough of each other!

Any tips for time budgeting for two young marrieds? Two full time students, both working, with demanding educations. Someone please tell me you have a magic wand.

Have an anxious concern for the other's well being.
Presdient Hinckley

You guys, I am anxiously concerned for the well being of this handsome fellow.


The Soul Anchor said...

I'm not married, so I wouldn't be one to speak on the matter. But someone else told me that it takes a lot of patience, a lot of forgiveness, and a lot of making out! :-D I thought that was cute.

Becca said...

soul anchor is right on! lots and lots of patience, forgiveness, and selflessness. your sharing your life with someone else now, it's important to always consider their needs and know that when they are happy it makes you so so happy! as long as you are with your best friend and you are doing it together, everything will work out. making out lots helps too ;)

Alexa Mae said...

you're amazing! and so beautiful!
i would say, make SURE you make time ONCE a week to go out on a date together. No looking at phones, no talking about work but just focusing on each other and each other's needs.
One night.
Even if it's staying in and ordering chinese with the tv off.

You are a great wife.

Alycia (Crowley Party) said...

I totally agree. We don't have many problems with family... more finding the appropriate time we need to be spending with each other to keep our relationship healthy and going :)

Megan said...

Time can definitely be tricky! We try to have a weekly date night AND a weekly stay at home night. Plus, we talk all throughout the day...either on the phone or by texting. We are so blessed to not have ANY family drama or money drama...so far!