At my first OB appointment, I got a bunch of magazines.
One thing they all had in common, well besides being about babies and pregnancy, was they all had pregnant women in them.
Let's just talk about this for a minute.
First, the subject of pregnancy nudity. How is it all of a sudden okay to have naked (aside from a strategically placed hand or logo) women everywhere? This doesn't mean I don't think pregnancy and bodies are beautiful. I could just do without the nudity. Anyone else?
These women are not normal, probably not even human.
They look mega sexy [see nudity tangent above] while I...haven't shaved my legs in two weeks.
They managed to put on a 15 layer outfit when I can hardly pull up my pants.
They have perfectly "glowing" skin and hair while I have acne, grays, and have lost basically all my precious blonde.
They look full of life and energy while I am ready to pass out by noon. And by noon I mean at about 9am.
They exercise in tiny workout "clothes" while I consider walking to classes in comfy t-shirt dresses more exercise than prudent.
They cook meals of quinoa, swiss chard, butternut squash and tofu while I consider eating more than a serving of veggies a day a victory over gag reflexes everywhere.
[I thought about inserting some images here of "pregnant women", but they're just too painful. Pick up your nearest issues of Fit Pregnancy and you'll know what I mean]
To cope with these traumatic visuals, at first I just figured these women weren't actually pregnant and were just models with pillows stuffed under their designer dresses. The problem is there's a lot of pictures that expose the bellies. They look kind of real.
So, I've concluded they're just
Immortal Magical Unicorn Pregnancy Princess Fairies
Really, it's the only logical solution.