It works or it doesn't

Remember how I told you how 94% of people are instant pregnancy experts when they find out someone is expecting? It's especially true when people find out I've been dealing with the incredibly poorly named symptom of pregnancy called "morning sickness." Whoever thought of this name either (a) wasn't that smart or (b) was blessed with dull nausea only in the mornings. You lucky dog. Anyway, at first, I was all about the tips and advice people would give me about things that helped with their pregnancy. After trying everything on the list for over a month, losing ten pounds, and reaching double digit daily puke counts (it's less gross when there's an alliteration right?), I decided everyone else had lost their marbles!

[warning- I'll try to keep things as delicate as possible, but when talking about morning sickness, certain words are bound to come up. Note: see alliteration above.]

Want to know what I tried?

Ginger- ginger supplements, ginger tea, ginger candies, ginger gum

Peppermint- peppermints, peppermint tea, peppermint oil

Emetrol- a gentle anti-nausea for young kids. It has a rainbow on the box. Isn't that sweet?

Eating crackers in the middle of the night- this worked out good since I was already up losing my dinner....of crackers

Malt- nope

Eating constantly- I have nothing to say about this one. We'll get to it later

Sucking on hard candy- just having something IN MY MOUTH initiated my gag reflexes...which progressed to...ya know.

Cinnamon tea- no cigar

Sea Bands- little things you wear on your wrists that are supposed to help with accupressure. The only thing they did was cut off my circulation. 

Unisom- maybe it helped me sleep a little.

B6- nothing

Unisom and ginger/B6 combination- nothing.

I know there's more I tried but understandably, there's too much to recall. It's a long list already. So after spending our unborn baby's college fund on these "cures" I was left very frustrated, I eventually found a few things that worked for me. And this, world, is my present to you.

1)STAY IN BED- this was simple. The more I moved, the more I threw up. This is sad, but there were a lot of days I didn't even get out of bed. This didn't take away the nausea and vomiting, but it lessened it, which was A-OKAY in my book.

2) SLEEP AS MUCH AS YOU WANT- now, this actually didn't help much aside from that I didn't wake up to throw up that often. BUT, when else in your life do you have such a valid excuse to sleep as much as you want? And believe me, I pretty much did. One day I went to bed at 7:30pm and didn't wake up until 10am. Not even ashamed. There were other days that came close as well. Gosh, I love to sleep.

3) PRENATALS/SHMENATALS- Since I couldn't keep down my prenatals, my doctor told me to take the chewable flinstone kids vitamins. This helped a lot. Just a few days ago I started trying the prenatals again. Wish me luck!

4) DON'T FORCE FEED- every time someone told me if I would just keep eating I wouldn't be sick, I felt the knots in my neck getting tighter and wanted to use some choice words. Obviously, that did not work for me even though I know it works great for others. It made it worse. A lot worse. I ate when I felt the need to. My esophagus, teeth and sanity thanked me.  

5)ZOFRAN- let me just tell you how amazing this little pill is. Without it, I might have had to spend the first trimester in a hospital bed from dehydration and starvation. Of course, this also didn't eliminate the vomiting and it certainly didn't take away the nausea (at all). BUT, I was able to keep down some food. [in case you're wondering, it took my puke count from like 13 to about 5. I'll take it!] And since I didn't spew everything I ate, I was able to eat more foods than just saltines, fruit popsicles, and gatorade. It was awesome. But, it's pricey. With getting the generic and my awesome insurance, it is $1 a pill...which can be a little frustrating when it comes right back up and you have to try again. But seriously, I will sing Mr. Zofran's praises til the day I die.

Don't worry. If you end up getting afflicted with this "morning sickness" nonsense, there are a few good things that come from it too.

First, since I lost so much weight there in the beginning, when food does sound good (read:edible) I don't have to worry about calories. If I want fatty potato soup or pizza, you best believe I'm gonna have it! Zero guilt too.

Second, you get more caught up on hulu than you ever wanted to be! Hopefully you'll be sick at a time where more is on! The shows I watch like Modern Family and Up All Night were off season. However, I managed to find a few replacements. Some were...very low quality. For example, I watched the entire season of switched at birth. Go me! I also got semi-into America's Got Talent. It's more entertaining than I thought.

Third, you can make your husband get everything for you when you're home. Honey, I'm thirsty. Can you cover my big toe? It would be so great if you started the movie for me. I could really go for some saltines right now.

Fourth, not wearing make-up or getting dressed is totally acceptable. Except for when you work. That's pretty much the only time I kind of got dressed. And for church.

And those, my friends, are pretty awesome things!

The count- I'm now 15 weeks and 4 days! Can I just say 5 since the day is almost over? Here's my picture from Sunday. SOOO EXCITED!!!!