Salted Apples

Instant Message conversation with Boyfriend on 12/28/10

Me: Let's go to Honduras and take care of all the kids who don't have any moms.

Did you know some kids get eaten alive by ants because they have no moms?

[5 minutes later.... que crickets!]

Oops, I meant to say rats, but that works to. [har har]

Boy: It is really sad. But it happens all over, unfortunately.

Me: Well, I want to go hold all the orhpans in the whole world and take care of them!

Boy: I know you do! Your heart is SO big. (see, told you he was sweet!)

Me: Do you think I could do it? Do you think I could hold them ALL? I want to tell them how special they are.

And give them an apple.

Maybe a salted apple, so they don't get goiters from iodine deficiency.(So I'm a nutrition major, sue me.)

Boy: Well, you probably couldn't but you could start an organization called "Hold an Orphan and Tell Them How Special They Are While Giving Them a Salted Apple"

What a grand idea.

Anyone who wants to donate to the cause is welcome!

Did you think the same thing when you read this?

Yep, a salted apple sounds nasty.

Oh, that's not it?

You're right. I have a sweetheart of a boyfriend.

Oh, I'm sorry. You haven't been formally intorduced. Everyone, this is Clint. With me. Because that's my favorite way to see him.

If you haven't had the pleasure of meeting him in real life, I feel sad for you. But count your blessings-your legs aren't being eaten off by ants...or rats, whatever. Most likely.